Beyoncé and Shakira Sit Pretty at Number One

This week the all-star pairing of Beyoncé and Shakira takes over the top spot. It was a prediction that anyone could have easily made. The only surprise was that it took several weeks for 'Beautiful
Liar' to reach the summit. In all honesty, it should be a great single. Unfortunately, the best parts of this whole collaboration are the rain soaked bum shakes in the video and the Freemasons remix that all but shakes the girls out of the song.

Right behind the girls and ready to claw into the top next week, The Arctic Monkeys jump 11-2 with their brand new single ‘Brainstorm’. Ironically the band that became so big on hearsay and the internet last year had to hold out for a physical release of their new single before cracking the top ten. This song should be around for at least a few more weeks as parent album "Favourite Worst Nightmare" sees the light of day this week.

Dropping from 1-3, the all star collaboration between Timbaland, Nelly Furtado and Justin Timberlake loosens the grip its had at the top for the last two weeks. While an awesome groove accompanies the track, ‘Give it to me’ remains little more than Nelly giving the kiss off to all those who called her a sell out, Justin giving the kiss off to all those who said sexy never left and Timbaland giving the kiss off to everyone else while reminding us all of how good he is.

Just below fellow Canadian Nelly Furtado, Avril Lavigne drops one with ‘Girlfriend’ leaving her number –one-less again this week despite strong sales.

At number 4, Mark Ronson Ft D Merriweather drop with ‘Stop Me’ a perfect summer sing-along dance track containing a smashing sample of 'You keep me hanging on’ – More the Kim Wilde version that The Supremes original.

Natasha Beddingfield lands another straight top tenner with her less than coy new single
’I wanna have your babies’ jumping 15-7. Very different from her last, more introspective hit 'Unwritten’, her new track is a fun ditty with a silly read-my-mind chorus and a funny
flute sound that just makes you feel happy. I’d love to hate this song given the inane title but it somehow works and has grown on me.

One spot below Natasha, Enemy pounce on the top ten with their track ‘Away From Here’ leaping 52-8.

Behind these hot movers, Peter Kay, Matt Lucas and the Proclaimers drop to number 9 while Gwen Stephanie loses her grip on the top five and falls four spots to number 10. If there is a God this song will nosedive faster than Gwen’s navel ring and we’ll be rid of it forever.

The highest of many debuts this week jets in at number 16. Ash haven't been in the charts for ions and would have loved to return to the top ten their first time out but as the title suggests 'You Can't Have It
All'.

Mika's 'Love Today continues to rocket up the chart 32-18 while former number one 'Grace Kelly' Hangs on at 22.

Former boy band Busted member, Matt Willis, rocks in at 31 with 'Crash' a brilliant remake of the The Primitives track from the 1995 soundtrack to Dumb and Dumber. Completely faithful to the original, Willis cashes in on his appearance on the British reality television show 'I'm a celebrity - get me out of here' and makes a comeback. But the brilliance of this song makes his paint by numbers cover a welcome return to the top 40. I only hope it doesn't burn up the lower regions before slipping into musical abyss.

At 32 Just Jack returns with 'Glory Days'. He must have last January in mind when he actually had a good single on the charts.

The lower reigns of the chart seem oddly late nineties. Ocean Colour Scene flow in at 34 with 'I Told You So' an odd piece of 60s throwback mixed with electric guitars - or in other words it sounds just like every other one of Ocean Colour Scene's 17 top forty hits.

The boys from Oasis once declared Black Rebel Motorcycle Club the best new band in the world. They were wrong of course and the 'Club soon fell off the radar after a few minor tracks that cracked the top 40, the titles of which I can't even remember or bother to look up. This week they motor in at 35 with 'Weapon of Choice' - my choice is flick the mute button on my stereo.

Travis returns to the top 40 at number 36 with 'Closer'. It’s been well over two years since Travis has had a hit. Unfortunately, this track does nothing to propel them into the midst of modern music, sounding oddly like a cast off from 'The Man Who" circa 1999.

Dancing in at 39 is a great new track from Meck Ft Dino. 'Feels Like Home' feels like a great clubber for the summer with its thumping sample from Felix's 'Don't You Want Me’. I hope that this track
makes the top regions of the top 40 home for a while but then I also hope some warm weather comes soon. But like spring in Canada, anything can happen on the UK Charts.

UK Chart snoozes in spring

The once obscenely volatile UK charts keep calm this week. The Proclaimers, Peter Kay and Matt Lucas lock on to the top spot for a second week with ‘I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)’.

Just below them Avril Lavigne, moves ‘Girlfriend’ into the runner up spot. With no signs of the number one track slowing down, Avril may just have to wait patiently for a few weeks before taking over the top.

However, since momentum will have slowed by then, ‘Girlfriend’ could remain a number 2 victim.

Gwen Stefani moves back up a notch with the worst song of her career, or ‘The Great Escape’ while Sugababes vs Girls Aloud plummet 2-14 with ‘Walk this way’. One more week ought to do it before their ship has completely sunk.

Just outside the top ten, ‘Last night a DJ saved my life’ by Seamus Haji Ft Kayjay rockets 38 to 13 while Kings Of Leon make an equally dramatic upward move 50-18 with “On Call’. Expect to see them in the top ten next week.

Former Spice Girl, Melanie C, returns with a blah version of ‘I want candy’ at 24. This song could have been named I want money since it sounds so ridiculous and half hearted that the ploy to cash in before she gets too old, comes screaming through every bar of the track.

Faithless dance back into the chart at number 38 with ‘Music Matters’ Ft Cass Fox while Mika jumps in ten doors down with ‘Love Today’.

Still clinging strong to the top ten with ‘Grace Kelly’, Mika's unofficial follow up ‘Lollipop’ climbs to 68 making him the artist with the most songs inside the top 75.

Of note this week, Snow Patrol remain in the top 40 with ‘Chasing Cars’ while follow ups “Set the fire to the third bar’ and ‘Eyes open” have completely disappeared from the rankings. This song may just have another summer run before it drives away.

Some golden oldies re-appear as towards the bottom of the barrel. Cat Stevens plants firmly at 52 with ‘Wild World’ while Elton John’s ‘Rocket Man’ takes off at 62. And to a lesser degree, Justin Timberlake brings ‘Sexyback’ to 72.